05/06/2023
Parenting is hard. Right? I mean the sleepless nights, sick babies, dirty diapers, puke appearing when you least expect it. From the colic cries to the two year old trantums, we are talking next level skills to manage. Earning a black belt is nothing compared to surviving and making it to that high school graduation. But the rewards??? They are better than airline miles any day! The unexpected hugs and kisses, the bed time stories, the giggles in the bubble bath, the waves from the stage when they see you in the audience, heart melters! I mean, I dare a Navy Seal to not tear up when they tell you “I love you” for the first time. And then there are the imposters. You know the ones. They would literally rather do anything in the world but parent or to be present. The ones that feel absolutely zero responsibility or connection to their own child. They put their own selfish needs above those of their children who they chose to have. The ones who feel that their children are an inconvenience and they can easily turn their backs on. I pity you. But I feel more for the child who grows up without the love of their parent. Who looks for you in the crowd when you aren’t there. The child who is dependent on you. The child who doesn’t understand why their parent says one thing and whose actions show something else entirely. You only get a certain amount of minutes in a lifetime. There are no do-overs, there are no time outs, there are no “maybe tomorrows”. There is today. There is this moment. Love them, be there for them, keep your word. None of us can count on seeing another sunrise or sunset. There will never be another recital in 2023, or a ball game, or a birthday, or a first tooth, a first day of school. Regret is a tough sleeping companion. It keeps you awake at night, distracts you during the day. It’s much easier to love with your whole heart, show up, be present, than to wish and pray that “if I had to do it over again I would do it differently.” Parenthood isn’t about perfection, it’s about presence.