13/08/2026
HAPPY 21ST BIRTHDAY TO JUNIOR SCONE BOY.
Twenty-one years ago, the universe made a decision that would eventually result in one very specific problem for us: Curtis.
What started as a Saturday-school-job arrangement has somehow evolved into this absolute weapon becoming a fully fledged member of the The A Team. From stacking shelves and doing dishes to taking on increasingly questionable levels of responsibility, Junior Scone Boy has gone from “the kid” to “he's actually pretty useful”
And now he’s 21.
Curtis, you’ve grown into one hell of a young man. You’re loyal, bloody hardworking, occasionally sensible, frequently questionable, and somehow still willing to answer the phone when I call you - no matter what you're doing at the time.
We’ve had the early mornings, the ridiculous shifts, the absolute disasters, the laughs, the arguments, the “what the fark are you doing?” moments and enough scone-related trauma to last several lifetimes.
And somewhere along the way, you stopped being just a staff member and became part of the furniture.
Unfortunately, like most furniture around here, you’re now far too expensive to replace.
So today, Junior Scone Boy graduates into the terrifying world of adulthood. Wishing you an AMAZING birthday JSB!
Now go make some questionable decisions. Just don't make them on work time.
