24/01/2023
Parents,
I know we are all exhausted and the world wants too much from us… I get it! I really do!
But can we talk about the perpetual cycle of anxious anticipation, false hope and expectation that so often ends in disappointment, frustration and resentment when it comes to pinning our wellbeing on our babies and children needing us less.
It’s not healthy.
Its not healthy for us and it’s not healthy for them.
And it continues to take our energy and focus off of what would actually give us relief in the here and now … community support.
And I know that’s not available to many right now.
I know.
But as long as we keep focusing in on our children and minimising their need for us and maximising our push towards their independence, we won’t see any real change to the culture and society who WANTS to keep us thinking we should be doing this all alone.
Coping alone.
Like it’s our child who is defective for needing us so much and that you’re only a good parent if you can train that away.
We need to get the word out there to every expectant family and every family with smalls that our children are going to need us intensely for YEARS.
Not weeks or months.
Years.
Legitimately need us.
Day and night.
For. Years.
And with that information, let’s set ourselves and our families up to best cope with that reality and demanding better from community and society to support us on it.
As long as all of our energy is being misdirected, the problems and all-consuming desperation we feel will continue.
I know you’re exhausted.
But this isn’t a sprint.
It’s a marathon and it’s one worth running but hooly dooly do we need to stop looking for illusionary finish lines and start looking for support to continue running.
✨Carly Grubb, 2023.
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