09/08/2026
Hello friends.
I wasn’t going to post because Ive been feeling very low. Then I thought this little old cake page has become a bit of a comfort to me. A way of getting things out that are stuck in my head. Uplifting and not so.
Yesterday I couldn’t have wrote anything. I felt so desperately heartbroken and helpless. I couldn’t think straight.
I love the little cottage, it’s so peaceful but I have so much to do. My helpers are wonderful and I don’t know what I would do without them but they have their own families and jobs so when I’m alone trying to unpack boxes, paint, clean, put things in the loft, sort the garden and just all of the things you have to do when you move in somewhere new. It hit me in the face as I was trying to put a heavy box in the loft. Andrew would normally be here to help me. Silly little things like ripping the empty boxes up without me even realising and sticking rubbish on the van but I’m alone. It’s the worst feeling and I battle so much to keep it out of my head but it wasn’t having any of it yesterday. I felt broken.
I’ve been through so much over the past year and other things nobody has a clue about the year before. But I put my face on and I smile.
It’s only a matter of time before it all catches up.
Isobel god love her, sat with me all day. Brought me a bag of groceries and flowers. Stayed until 9 last night. She hasn’t been well with her blood pressure. Dr thinks the baby will have to come three weeks before her due date. All of these things I would talk to her dad about.
I am grateful for everything I have but I’m also angry at the moment.
Andrews first year anniversary is fast approaching at the end of august. I just can’t believe it’s nearly a year since I’ve held his hand.
Isobel bought me the beautiful geranium and I planted a new house plant.
Sorry it’s a bit of a glum post x see you on the other side 💛