20/05/2026
I just submitted my final assignment which completes my first year at university! I’ve been pretty quiet on social media because my life has been so full lately and I’ve been absolutely knackered! 🤣
I spent the best part of 20 years working on my own and for myself which afforded me things that I’ll never take for granted. Time with my children, the option to homeschool them and personal pride for being able to overcome our beginning as a young, single-parent family.
Every time I hit a milestone at uni I hear the words my Leilani said to me when I was going back and forth about whether I should do it. At the time I was having to pay to take my English GCSE to be able to take up my conditional offer and then study for the exam and then pass it with just a few weeks to spare. Then I was wrestling with the idea of 3 years of study at my age! She said “but mum the time is going to pass anyway, just do it”. I’m so glad I listened to her. Avaiyia has been an amazing source of inspiration and encouragement. She makes me feel like I can do anything!
Now here we are a whole year of uni under my belt thanks to the support and encouragement of my lovely mum and my babies.
Leilani is a month away from graduating having finished university a few weeks ago! She’s the first in our family to go to university, I’m the second! That is bonkers! If you’ve been here from the start, you’ll remember me calling Avaiyia and Leilani my propellers. They have been my motivation since I became a mummy. They are literally adults now, carving out their own lives. I recognised my devotion to them becoming something less wholesome and more dependent. All my worth and value was tied up in my children and as they grew I felt less and less motivated. The work was done and my ambition waned. I was not focussed on myself at all. So much has changed and I am so excited for what’s next. I work part time as a baker alongside my studies. I have amazing colleagues and for the first time in over 20 years, I have a regular, guaranteed income! I loved being self employed but I also love my job and my university course.
What I realised is that because I left school at 15 with no qualifications, I really underestimated my capabilities. I was daunted by an academic setting, not to mention at my age. I thought I would have to be tunnel visioned and locked in to cope with academia. Turns out I’m flying through the course. I’ve gotten a first in every assignment so far! I can study, work AND make the odd cake for my faves here and there. I haven’t had the chance to miss making cakes because of course I’ve still been honouring all the orders in the diary. There are more weddings in the coming months, and whilst I’ve appreciated the quiet and the time to focus on my studies and my new role, there is really no reason why I can’t take on the odd cake order here and there. Over the summer, I’ll be accepting a couple of cake orders a week and I’ll reevaluate when my 2nd year at uni kicks in. I’ll be honest, I’m not making any cakes I don’t want to make. It’s so freeing being able to do it for the creativity and the love of the craft without it being tied to our very survival. I’m reclaiming the things I love to do in the ways I love to do them and I am getting so good at looking forward with excitement instead of back with longing. I will never stop wishing I could raise my girls all over again because it has been the biggest joy of my life! But thanks to them and the loving family we have built together, I am ready to dive into the next chapter.
Things were pretty tough for a while there. I’m not the best at coping with big life changes but transitions are opportunities for growth. Working on my own allowed me to create a space with no benchmarks, no accountability, no reflections. Those conditions don’t create many opportunities for self reflection or self awareness. I’m really enjoying not knowing everything in this new field. Learning at work from other professionals is a new and welcome development.
So there you have it, the life update nobody asked for! 😂
I hope you’re all having a lovely time! 🥰
Love & Cupcakes
Renée
