The Wobbly Cake Co.

16/10/2026

13/10/2026

🍪🎂 BREAKING NEWS: THE HUMBLE CUSTARD CREAM HAS DEVELOPED DELUSIONS OF GRANDEUR. 🎂🍪

You know the Custard Cream.

That dependable little biscuit. Quietly minding its own business in the biscuit tin. Perfectly happy being dunked in tea.

Well, not anymore.

It’s had a birthday makeover.

Introducing the CUSTARD CREAMS CAKE, baked for a rather special birthday treat! 🥳

Three gloriously generous layers of soft vanilla sponge, sandwiched with enormous pillows of creamy custard-flavoured frosting.

And on top?

More frosting. Obviously.

Followed by a frankly unreasonable number of actual Custard Cream biscuits, standing proudly to attention amongst a generous scattering of crushed biscuit rubble.

Because apparently putting biscuits inside a cake wasn’t enough.

We needed biscuits ON the cake too.

This is essentially what happens when a perfectly respectable British biscuit wins the lottery and decides to buy a mansion. 🍪🏰

It’s nostalgic. It’s indulgent. It’s gloriously over the top.

And it raises one very important question:

Does having a slice of Custard Cream Cake count as having tea and biscuits?

I’m going with yes.

Happy Birthday! 🎉🍰

The Wobbly Cake Co. — where delicious meets delightfully imperfect.

EastSussex

09/10/2026

🍰🚨 THREE GLUTEN-FREE CAKES HAVE TAKEN OVER THE CAFE AT EGGS TO APPLES FARM SHOP!🚨🍰

The situation at Eggs to Apples Farm Shop has escalated.

Not one. Not two. But THREE gloriously gluten-free Wobbly creations have arrived in the café TODAY!

Local authorities have been informed.

They’ve suggested putting the kettle on. ☕

Today’s dangerously tempting line-up:

🥕 GLUTEN-FREE CARROT CAKE
Three generous layers of moist, warmly spiced carrot cake, sandwiched with clouds of cream cheese frosting and topped with crunchy nuts.

Contains vegetables. Technically a salad.

☕ GLUTEN-FREE COFFEE & WALNUT CAKE
Three magnificent layers of coffee-infused sponge, filled with creamy coffee frosting and plenty of walnut crunch.

Essentially a cappuccino you can chew.

Perfectly legitimate breakfast, then.

🇩🇰 GLUTEN-FREE DANISH DREAM CAKE
Golden, fluffy sponge topped with gloriously sticky, caramelised coconut.

The Danes have clearly been keeping this one a secret.

Frankly, we deserve an explanation.

🍰 ALL THREE ARE GLUTEN-FREE!

No sad little biscuit in a plastic wrapper. No consolation flapjack.

PROPER. GREAT. BIG. CAKE.

Available by the slice at Eggs to Apples Farm Shop café TODAY, while they last!

Can’t decide?

Carrot cake for your vegetables.
Coffee & walnut for your caffeine.
Danish Dream Cake for your emotional wellbeing.

A perfectly balanced diet.

Probably. 😂

The Wobbly Cake Co. — where delicious meets delightfully imperfect.

06/10/2026

🍋❤️ A VERY BELATED THANK YOU… IN THE FORM OF AN UNREASONABLY LARGE CAKE. ❤️🍋

Apparently Teaching Assistant Appreciation Day happened.

And apparently somebody forgot to tell the cake department.

So, slightly late — but considerably larger than a card — this Raspberry & Lemon Cake was baked for the brilliant TAs at a local primary school. 🍰📚

Three enormous layers of soft lemon sponge, generously filled with raspberry preserve and great clouds of lemon-infused freshly whipped cream, finished with a suitably enthusiastic snowfall of icing sugar.

Because teaching assistants deserve more than a hurried:

“Thanks for everything!”

They deserve cake.

A LOT OF CAKE.

For supporting children, calming wobbles, finding missing jumpers, wiping tears, encouraging reluctant learners, solving approximately 847 minor emergencies before lunchtime and somehow knowing exactly where that thing somebody definitely left right there has gone.

So yes, the official appreciation day may have passed.

But appreciation doesn’t have an expiry date.

Cake, on the other hand, probably does.

So you’d better eat it. 😂🍰

A huge, if slightly belated, THANK YOU to all the wonderful teaching assistants out there. ❤️

The Wobbly Cake Co. — where delicious meets delightfully imperfect.

05/10/2026

🎃 NEW CAKE TESTING HAS OCCURRED. THIS IS NOT A DRILL. 🎃

There are moments in the bakery when a sensible person would think:

“Perhaps I have enough cake flavours now.”

Fortunately, no sensible person was present.

So, meet the latest experiment from The Wobbly Cake Co.:

PUMPKIN SPICE LAYER CAKE. 🎃🍰

Three enormous layers of beautifully soft, moist pumpkin and cinnamon sponge, sandwiched with great pillows of tangy cream cheese frosting and scattered throughout with crushed pecans encased in homemade toffee.

And then, because apparently restraint had already left the building, more cream cheese frosting went on top.

Followed by a small geological event involving toffee pecans.

Soft pumpkin cake with a deliberately less-sweet cream cheese frosting and crunchy toffee pecans. Adapted into a towering round Wobbly version, and I can confirm several important findings from the testing process:

🎃 Pumpkin absolutely belongs in cake.
🍂 Cinnamon makes everything feel approximately 73% more autumnal.
🧀 Cream cheese frosting should be measured in depth, not quantity.
🥜 Turning pecans into toffee and then smashing them up is both therapeutic and dangerous.
🍰 Cutting a great chunk out of a three-layer cake purely to photograph the inside definitely counts as quality assurance.

And LOOK AT THAT CROSS-SECTION. 👀

This is essentially autumn wearing a cream cheese hat.

Verdict: I think this one might have to join the Wobbly repertoire.

Although further testing will obviously be required.

Possibly several slices’ worth.

For science. 🔬🎃

The Wobbly Cake Co. — where delicious meets delightfully imperfect.

03/10/2026

💍🍰 WEDDING CAKE TASTING: A VERY SERIOUS BUSINESS. 🍰💍

Choosing your wedding cake is one of the biggest decisions of married life.

Apparently.

So naturally, the only sensible approach is to provide four entire mini cakes and call it “research”. 👀

This little gluten-free tasting box headed out with four contenders:

🍋 GF Lemon Curd Sponge — sharp, zingy lemon curd with lemon-infused cream cheese frosting.

🫐 GF Lemon & Blueberry — layers of juicy blueberry filling and lemon-infused cream cheese frosting.

❤️ GF Lemon & Raspberry — tangy raspberry running through layers of that same gloriously lemony frosting.

🥭 GF Lemon, Passionfruit & Mango — tropical, zingy and dangerously easy to eat. Lemon, passionfruit and mango paired with layers of lemon-infused cream cheese frosting.

All four are three-layer gluten-free mini cakes, because trying wedding cake flavours from a tiny forkful is frankly inadequate research.

They were boxed up individually, labelled, bagged and sent off for the difficult task of deciding which one deserves a place at the wedding.

Although there is, of course, another option:

Have all four.

Problem solved.
You’re welcome. 😂

And yes, one of these flavours may look rather familiar… 🥇👀

The Wobbly Cake Co. — where delicious meets delightfully imperfect.

02/10/2026

🍰🚨 CAKE EMERGENCY AT EGGS TO APPLES. 🚨🍰

I’m not saying you need to rearrange your entire day around cake.

But I’m also not not saying that.

Two gluten-free Wobbly Cakes have landed in the café at Eggs to Apples Farm Shop TODAY — and they’re available while they last.

☕ Gluten-Free Tiramisu Cake
Three gloriously chunky layers of coffee-soaked sponge, sandwiched with clouds of coffee-infused cream cheese and finished with more cream cheese and a generous dusting of cocoa.

Basically tiramisu looked at cake and thought, “I could do that.”

❤️ Gluten-Free Red Velvet Cake
Three deep-red layers, plenty of cream cheese frosting and a completely unnecessary-but-absolutely-necessary scattering of red velvet cake rubble on top.

Subtle? No.

Delicious? Very much the general idea.

Gluten-free people of Sussex, THIS IS YOUR MOMENT.

No standing forlornly beside the cake counter while everyone else eats something exciting.

No sad little wrapped biscuit retrieved from somewhere behind the till.

You get the enormous cake. 🎉

Both are available by the slice in the café at Eggs to Apples Farm Shop today, while they last.

And given the frankly irresponsible dimensions involved, one slice may technically qualify as lunch.

Possibly dinner.

I’m not a nutritionist. I’m a baker. These are very different qualifications.

The Wobbly Cake Co. — where delicious meets delightfully imperfect.

27/09/2026

🍫🍺 GUINNESS. BUT MAKE IT CAKE. 🍺🍫

There are sensible chocolate cakes.

And then there are chocolate cakes that look at sensible chocolate cakes and say, “That’s adorable.”

Meet the Chocolate Guinness Cake.

Two enormous, dark, ridiculously moist layers of chocolate Guinness sponge, held together with great clouds of cream cheese frosting, before being topped with even more frosting and a generous dusting of cocoa.

Because restraint is important.

Just not here.

The Guinness gives the sponge that wonderfully deep, malty richness without making the cake taste like someone has accidentally dropped a pint into the mixing bowl.

Although, technically, someone has dropped a pint into the mixing bowl.

That someone was me.

On purpose.

The result is a cake with the structural presence of a small bungalow and approximately the same likelihood of surviving the weekend.

Chocolate. Guinness. Cream cheese frosting.

Three things that had absolutely no need to form an alliance, but did so anyway for the greater good. 🍰

The Wobbly Cake Co. — where delicious meets delightfully imperfect.

27/09/2026

📚🍰 BREAKING LITERARY NEWS: THE WOBBLY CAKE CO. HAS BEEN PUBLISHED. SORT OF. 🍰📚

A rather substantial collection of Wobbly bakes headed off to a literary festival — because apparently books alone are no longer enough to sustain the intellectual classes.

There were plots. There were twists. There was character development. Mostly mine, after spending an unreasonable amount of time cutting cake into rectangles.

The anthology included:

🥕 Gluten-free Carrot Cake — rich, spiced and topped with cream cheese frosting and pecans. A weighty classic. Probably Russian.

🍋 Gluten-free Lemon Crumb Cake — sharp, buttery, crumbly and considerably easier to get through than War and Peace.

🇩🇰 Gluten-free Danish Dream Cake — soft sponge beneath that gloriously sticky, caramelised coconut topping. Technically Danish, so we’ll call this the international fiction section.

And then there were even more bakes, because sending a sensible quantity of cake to a literary festival would have shown an alarming lack of commitment to the narrative.

Several boxes left Wobbly HQ.
None contained a bookmark.
All contained significantly more butter than your average paperback.

My hope is that somewhere, at this very moment, somebody is discussing the symbolism of a challenging new novel while quietly wondering whether it would be socially acceptable to take a third piece of cake.

It is.

In fact, I’d argue it’s essential to the plot. 📖🍰

The Wobbly Cake Co. — where delicious meets delightfully imperfect.

26/09/2026

🌟🖤 A BIRTHDAY CAKE FROM A GALAXY FAR, FAR AWAY… 🖤🌟

A very special cake left The Wobbly Cake Co. kitchen for a 40th birthday celebration — with a little Star Wars inspiration!

This one needed to be both egg-free AND dairy-free, proving that dietary requirements certainly don’t have to mean missing out on a proper celebration cake. 🎂

Dressed dramatically in black, with flashes of edible gold leaf, golden stars and clusters of shimmering gold spheres, it was ready for the finishing touch — Star Wars toppers added at the party to complete the theme. ✨⭐

Dark, dramatic, a little bit sparkly… and definitely worthy of turning 40 on the Dark Side. 😈

May the cake be with you. 🌌

Happy 40th! 🥳

Where delicious meets delightfully imperfect.